Leonid S. Sukhorukov
"All About Everything"
L I F E B E F O R E A N D A F T E R
- Life is the distance between dreams and reality.
- Life consists of two phases: first you have health and no brains, then you have brains and no health.
W I S D O M A N D F O L L Y
- Wisdom is the meeting point of doubt and certainty.
- It's in our nature to make mistakes, that is why we refuse to accept them.
T E M P O R I S M S
- Time is a trap. You can't live in the past, the present doesn't exist, and the future isn't certain.
- An everlasting paradox: it's easier to kill time than to stop it.
- The golden age of silver hair.
T R U T H A N D L I E S
- A liar is one who is too good to be true.
- Some seek truth in churches but crucify it outside.
- We all love truth, but we can't always bear it.
A M O U R I S M S
- The less we love a woman, the more women we love.
- When you teach a man you teach a person - when you teach a woman you learn a lesson.
I N S I C K N E S S A N D I N
H E A L T H
- A filling is a dentist's food supplement.
- Our diseases are so old-fashioned, they can't keep up with the new medicines.
A L I T T L E L E A R N I N G . . .
- Education is the scientific exchange of ignorance.
- No matter how long you teach a fool, he still knows everything.
H U M O U R I S M S
- Improvisation is a desperate attempt to remember the tune.
- Life is no laughing matter - but imagine life without laughter.
D I P L O M A T I S M S
- A diplomat is one who goes to his superior with his own opinion and comes out with the official line.
P O L I T I C I S M S
- Politicians are all the same. They promise reforms then reform their promises.
- Politics is the abstract art of concrete promises.
- Top politicians never err - they are simply misinformed from below.
W A R A N D P E A C E
- Peace is always lost in someone's pocket.
- All roads lead to Rome, but some roads to peace lead straight to Pompeii.
- Oil is an ideal lubricant for hostilities.
B U R E A U D O X E S
- A country without bureaucrats is no laughing matter. But a country with too many of them is a complete joke.
- Bureau-ecological paradox: in order to save one tree, ten are felled for the paperwork.
- He used to spend long hours in search of a free minute.
- Red tape logic: the longer you think about today, the sooner it becomes yesterday.
M O N E Y R I C H A N D P O O R
- Business is immortal: it flourishes even in graveyards.
- Pay is the only unfair part of a fair job.
- Poverty has nothing to lose and lots to find.
S I L L Y Q U E S T I O N S
- Does infinity have at least reasonable limits?
- Why is it easier to fire a person who does the work of ten than those ten whose work he does?
I N A D V I S A B L E A D V I C E
- Never consider yourself too big - it's a small world.
- If you don't believe in the resurrection of the dead, look at politicians seeking re-election.
- Favours end up as rights.
- A cat which has been in the bag too long becomes a rat.
- You can't invent the wheel without bending the rules.
- Some editors punish bad authors by publishing them.